A Beautiful New Year

Such a gift is a new year. This morning is New Year’s Eve. I am amazed at how those around me have already begun their new year’s resolutions. It is funny how excited we get at the thought of a clean slate or a new way of approaching life but then very quickly slip back into the everyday from the past. Sitting here on this overcast, quiet and thoughtful morning I would like to say that this is bad, my thoughts on this say otherwise. Why is it that we desire change? Maybe because we are human, we have free will to make these choices. Maybe it is because the grass is greener in someone else’s pasture (envy?). Maybe it is due to an eye opening experience that changed our souls? Whatever the reason; most of us approach the New Year with the giddy of a 10 year old begging for a new gadget. If only we can do this, get this or stick to this; our lives will blossom! Even if we get, do or receive the newness fades quickly. Why is it that most of us never stick to the promises we make to ourselves on New Year’s? News flash…for most of us it is because we didn’t have that soul changing, face slapping wake up call telling us what we had was all that bad.. Our lives most likely, short of something devastating were in actuality probably pretty amazing! If you did experience that eye opening moment, you probably made changes in your lifestyle and stuck with them. If you didn’t then I guess the bigger question would be why did you actually make that resolution? Was it because you felt your appearance wasn’t good enough? Your home not organized enough, were you just not enough? This year I urge you to look at the resolutions you are making and why you are making them. If you are making a promise so you can fit into some mold that is not you (societal expectations) then maybe rethink things. How can you adjust “What REALLY IS YOU”? What would actually make you a happier, healthier or better person? God has called each one of us to be individuals; to each set out and make our own positive impact in life. Whether this means losing weight, meeting career goals or serving others look at where you are and have been when choosing new paths. If you love desert and hate exercising then you already know right out of the gate you are most likely not going to give up pie, chips and soda or make it to the gym 4 days a week (of course be realistic, your health is a concern). If you want to be on time, have a cleaner house, be more successful in your career or become a missionary. Don’t walk in the door January 1st and burn out on January 30th. Start small & gradually take your new promise on a test drive; try out a few “promise models” till you find one that you can love. Be sure and ask yourself along the way, am I going to enjoy this and the results it provides? When you love what and why you are doing something; it will become a part of you. You will never be younger than you are right this moment. You might be prettier, more financially stable, thinner, healthier, or just straight up a better person due to a resolution you make on new year’s; but be honest with yourself. The worst promises you can break are those to yourself. When you let yourself down you let everyone around you down. It degrades your self-worth and often undermines your abilities to make good decisions for yourself and those you love. If you want to be better (nothing specific) but just a better you in this New Year, sit down and look at your past. Thumb through old photos; stare out a window with a cup of coffee. Then decide. My Grandmom gave me a cross stitched picture years ago when I was in high school applying for colleges and thinking life was over whelming (I also thought years ago my size 3 body was fat and when it was a size 5 after my first 2 children were born; another subject another day). The cross stitch has the image of a fat little mouse stepping around a mouse trap. The words carefully stitched on it have remained true throughout my life. “Remember these trying times will be the good old days in the years to come”. No matter where you are now; you are only in a place of improving and appreciating where you are and what God has given you. Choose your resolutions wisely. May your choices create joy and peace in you and those around you. Happy New Year! Copyright 2015 Micheline Edwards

Wishing you happiness, joy and a politically correct cup????

“Hope your birthday is a happy one? Happy Anniversary? Get Well Soon?” hmmm…..Right cups and mugs; I don’t usually choose trending topics. There has been a lot of hoopla about Starbucks the last few days and if their throw away take out cups are inductive of the holiday season or not. Notice I said holiday season? That’s right I said it. I am a Christian but it really doesn’t matter? True religion calls someone to believe in a power greater than themselves, to become humble and to have faith in what they can't see or explain. Saying “Happy Holidays” to me simply means, I hope you enjoy the time span between Oct 31 and Jan 1 however you decide to celebrate. Saying happy holidays is about offering a greeting of happiness to someone; it’s saying I hope your next few weeks are filled with joy. It is not a statement about religious choices or even a question about if someone has a belief. Seriously do you ever see, “Wishing you a happy holiday season?” People seriously stop applying a question to the holiday season. Our holiday cards are not asking how you chose to celebrate nor are they a survey of religious preferences. Holiday greetings are supposed to just say have a great time (it is a usually followed by a period or an exclamation point). Let’s face it, it is really a secular holiday designed to allow you to celebrate however you choose (of course let's not ignore the capital gains). If you choose to take this time as most Americans do, to celebrate with family and friends, to get together, to share gifts, to be thankful, to dress up (be it Halloween, All Saints or New Year’s),to spark your religious beliefs and actually attend a holy service of some sort (don’t lie to yourself we all know Christmas and Easter services are triple attendance from the rest of the year), to take or share a dinner with those you love…..You are celebrating “A HOLIDAY” (call a spade a spade). If you can get up in the morning and go buy yourself a five dollar cup of coffee from somewhere. Yay You! You woke up, you probably have a job and your body is working. If you don’t like the throw away cup your beverage came in here is a tip; since you care about world justice. Try bringing your own cup and not contribute to environmental issues. If you can buy a Starbucks Coffee you can probably afford a reusable cup; with whatever makes you happy on the front of it. For five dollars you could make a cup at home and give breakfast to someone in need. You get the picture. So what is the right cup, attitude or right anything? The right cup is the one that makes you smile. I have a cupboard of coffee cups given to me with love by my family. Each one makes me smile when I use it because of a memory is attached to someone I love. A cup that works for you might be one that is actually full (hint...maybe we are not talking about a cup anymore????) As a Christian I am happy to celebrate with those I love throughout the coming season regardless of what moves them. I want those I care about to be happy, healthy, safe and to be in love with life. I want them to get up and actually have a cup with something in it & to look forward to each morning. Life is about potential and choices. Make choices that create joy for you but that do not cause harm to others (a throw away cup or saying happy holidays does no harm). Get up every morning and see the potential that has been given to you for that day;figure out a way to make the most of it. Learn to laugh, love and give. Giving to others is the greatest give you can give to yourself. You can do this and feel free to choose whatever coffee cup you wish, heck go crazy and put something like soda or tea in it. Be a rebel with good intentions, smile and don’t complain about things that make no difference in the life of you or others when you have the potential to make a positive impact every day in the world. So "fill your cup" and get out there and doing something good! Copyright 2015 Micheline Edwards; Five Children and a Farm White Picket Fences and Grace. “Whenever violence is done in the name of religion, we must make it clear to everyone that in such instances we are not dealing with true religion” ~Pope John Paul II 1998

Carving Memories

I should be working on a paper I have due but have found myself arm deep in pumpkin guts. I know this may seem as though my priorities are askew. Maybe they are. My kids are all preparing for Halloween and All Saints Day and our youngest has invited us to join at his new home this year to help hand out treats. We are planning to carve pumpkins tomorrow the kids that are available. So I really should set some priorities and finish my paper. My children and myself love Halloween because of the fun memories we have of amazing costumes and elaborately carved pumpkins. Most of these fun things were made by my parents with love. My siblings and I won so many school costume contests as kids I think my mom might have had a competitive side to her we didn't always see! My father made pies for the school carnivals that always went to the highest bidders and my mother’s pumpkins (and costumes) were something to be in awe over. It was a time of getting in the mood for celebrating the coming holiday season. Yes, I did use the term holiday because at my house when growing up we sort of had a three month (four if you throw in Valentine’s Day) holiday party that climaxed at Christmas. My parents never actually emphasized the material things as you might suspect by what I have just written. Mom and Dad were about the magic and getting the most out of family time..the simple things. This started each fall with huge piles of leaves, lots of baking and of course Halloween fun. I love pumpkins their beautiful cheerful orange faces cannot be passed without a smile. I am assuming I got this love from my mother. She would usually only get one pumpkin (money was tight) and while we were at school she would spend hours; sometimes two afternoons making this glorious orange globe into a work of art. My mother would do this long before there were carving kits, patterns and Pinterest. Mamma only used her favorite carving knife; which she claims to this day she can’t work without. Mama’s jack-o’-lanterns would begin in her amazing imagination and be “painted” onto this plump orange canvas. She would add elaborate details and shading that would cause these to be beautiful before being lit but become museum worthy by adding a simple candle. Everyone who ever saw one of these creations was always left speechless. This year as was for the last few years mom cannot carve a pumpkin. She is too frail and her mind fades in and out of the present. Last week I went with my daughter in law to decorate pumpkins at the care center where mom needs to be. She played along well and was frustrated with applying the stickers and such they provided (they kept sticking to her hands and not the pumpkin). When her pumpkin was complete one of the aides asked if she could take a picture of her with her pumpkin and she agreed. As the photo was done mom’s memory kicked in and she told me that this pumpkin was nothing like “her” carved ones. She told me she was going to do that this year. About ten years ago I got mom one of the good quality foam carving pumpkin and asked her to carve that one that year so we could keep one of her lovely creations for when she couldn’t make them anymore. She agreed, but never did carve it. The pumpkin still sits whole on her porch each fall. Mom won’t ever be able to carve it or others. So this year in honor of family, memories, traditions and my mother I carved a pumpkin for my mother’s room. I used only a knife and a spoon (ok I used a skewer for a few dots, have no idea how mom did those). Mine turned out ok not anything as amazing as my mom’s and if mom is having a good day she will no doubt give me tips. But she will have her carved pumpkin to enjoy. So Mama here’s to all the magic, joy and smiles you brought us as children, to your grandchildren and others throughout the years with your unbridled imagination and love of life. Thanks for raising us to appreciate the little things and to celebrate every day. Sometimes life isn’t about the impact you purposely add to it but the memories you left that you didn’t know you were adding along the way.Copyright 2015 Micheline Edwards

A wedding wish..today and always.

Today is the beginning of your two becoming one. While you will both remain independent, smart, funny and able to make your own decisions you will also be embarking on a new venture. This adventure isn’t totally new; hopefully you have been training for it your whole life even if you were unaware. This is the voyage of a life time one that will come easily at times and be the hardest thing you’ve had to do at other times. For some it is the first realization that everything you do will ultimately affect another. For others this may be a repeated attempt to be the half of a whole that is one solid piece yet has separate thoughts, ideas and emotions. This trip begins before the “I do” and ends as you breathe your last breath. Marriage is not a party, but there will be some. Marriage is the act of surrendering yourself to another with careful and deliberate abandonment. It is not a selfish act but one where your heart should be in a constant state of sacrifice. To love someone is to give to another. Being ready to lay down your all for someone is not something taken lightly but on this adventure it will be the only way to continue your trip. When your spouse cries, loves, laughs, hurts your empathy and compassion for that will be insurmountable and like a rock. Our abilities to give are often easy. To be a giver you must also allow yourself to be a receiver. There is energy flow like the ocean tide that comes and goes; sometimes you gift and sometimes you receive. Like the water you are one fluid being, picking up bits and pieces and leaving some behind and all the while in motion. While it is with great joy you enter into this union and with your heavenly father as witness and a guide. Your wedding day is the beginning of the journey. May you travel with a servant’s heart ready to lay down your all for each other and with this shared load your adventure will be one of greatness. Many blessings. ~Micheline Edwards White Picket Fences 2015 ~In your lives you must think and act like Christ Jesus. Philippians 2:5 “Our modern culture teaches us to always fight and look out for number one. On this day remember that your one is more and to act with a servants heart as we are called to do and to lay aside yourself to others. In this you will find great joy” http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=servant+song&FORM=VIRE9#view=detail&mid=8036E63D1AC7B27283248036E63D1AC7B2728324 "Live with passion, love without surrender"

Happy mother's day, week, year....lifetime

What a bittersweet week. Twenty seven years (and one week) ago, my husband and I were welcoming our daughter into the world. Just this week she welcomed her first child. Our daughter was two months early and our grandson almost two weeks late. Both mommas labored for over 48hrs and both babies spent a time in a NICU. One baby was for observation and the other fighting for her life. Both are doing great and are healthy today. Tomorrow I am leaving to meet our new grandson. I am flying across the country at the same time that my oldest son will be leaving (on his son’s 6th birthday) to fly across the world. I will be back in a week; he will be back in a year. As the week comes to a close the world will be celebrating Mother’s Day. Our daughter was always my Mother’s Day baby. It will be a blessing to be spending a portion of my daughters first Mother’s Day with her. I also realized along with the joy of sharing a first Mother’s Day; I will also most likely be missing my mother’s last. Life often hands us the most delicate situations. This week my emotions have been on extreme highs and lows. All of this roller coaster is centered around being a mother. To all of you mothers out there and to everyone who has a mother (you know you do) cherish her and let her know how much you love her. A woman’s heart is really never light once she becomes a mother; as she carries the weight of so many other people within her soul. “Where can I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? If I ascend into heaven, you are there. If I make my bed in hell, you are there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.” ~Psalm 139: 7-10 Every mother knows that like Gods presence even though you cannot see or hear or even feel her physical being with you, you know that as long as you are; she is always with you. To all the mothers who rejoice in their children’s joys and grieve when their hearts are sad. To all the mothers who feel pain when their child hurts & burst with happiness at every accomplishment. To all the mothers with children here with them and to those whose children are angels among us. To every mother who has sat up all night worrying or filling Christmas stockings. To all of you who spend hours, days, weeks, month and years of your life devoted to your children. To all of you, whoever you may be Happy Happy Mother’s Day!

April Fool's Day...

April fool’s day is over, it came and went without a sound in our home this year. I thought about it briefly but that is as far as it went. Goodness, I couldn't even come up with a catchy title for this blog entry.The past few months have been such a blur caring for my parents and trying to keep things going for our family. As long as I remember my parents always loved April fool’s day and would always play jokes on each other and all of the kids. One of the first I remember was the morning dad came in from feeding. My brother, sister and I were all eating breakfast and getting ready for school. Dad announces that mom’s horse had just foaled. Mom laughed; replied, "April fools" and went about her business. Dad washed up and sat down and asked if she had seen the colt yet? Mom was just humoring dad as she went to the window. We kids watched as mom's jaw dropped. Her favorite horse had a beautiful colt running around in the pen as she glanced out. I always played some kind of prank on my kids or my mom. Usually the pranks on my mom involved a call in some foreign accent telling her she had won the big prize. Surprisingly enough I found that if I waited a couple of years between these calls she always fell for it. She either forgot or at least played along very well. My favorite April fool’s joke was elaborately planned and flawlessly executed. I started in September. I created a fictitious family or well…some long lost friends. Anyone who knows my parents knows that they seldom ever admit that they don’t know something or someone. The plan was perfect! I wrote them a series of letters over several months including a family Christmas letter complete with all the family drama and of course a darling set of twins. I went on and on in each letter about how I missed seeing them and couldn’t wait till our RV trip would bring us in spring to Missouri so we could stop in to see them. Each letter was then given to my father in law who loves a good prank as well. My father in law travels a lot and mailed each and every letter from a different zip code all over the U.S. The first letters came; mom and dad didn’t mention them. By Christmas they were telling us all about their good friends and all of their travels. This was getting better than I had imagined. It was getting harder and harder to contain my giggles and keep a poker face as February rolled around. Dad was now confiding to a few that he wasn’t sure he remembered these people. Maybe they were mom’s friends, she sure seemed to know them. By March, mom was starting to showing signs of panic as she realized dad couldn’t figure out who they were and they were now on their way to come visit for a week! One day about the last week in March I paid mom a planned visit. I asked her how she knew these people (who were consuming every conversation at this point). They seemed so excited to see her. Mom sat there for a bit very quietly. She leaned across the table and whispered, “Honey, I can’t tell your father. I don’t know who the hell these people are.” Right there the prank had actually hit its high and my adrenaline was over the top. I took a deep breath, collected my poker face and said “Hmmmm…..” Yes, that was the best I could do. Then I told her I would see if I could look them up on the computer for her. She said that would be nice because she didn’t want some strangers just showing up parking in their yard and eating their food! On April 1st at 9am sharp, I called my mom. In one of my best northeastern accents, I told her I was her long lost friend and that we would be there in an hour (of course the phone cut out after this). I dressed the kids showed up at my parents with a box of donuts with a large manila envelope on top. As my parents opened the envelope there was another envelope from their “friends”. Inside it read, “April fools”. My parents talked about this for years and even laughed at many holiday meals with my father in law about his part in this prank to end all pranks. This year was different. I ran my errands. The family was busy. I got home to clean and the pressure washer wouldn’t start. I was tired and decided to go see mom and do some grocery shopping for Easter Sunday. I went out and cut several spring flowers for mom and went to the retirement home. As I entered mom’s room she was sleeping. I gave her a kiss and she reached up to smell the flowers. We talked as I arranged the flowers and watered them. As I sat there my mind wandered to what day it was. I told mom and suggested that we play a joke on someone. She agreed that maybe we should tell her nurses that when I came in she was levitating. I laughed and said sure why not. Then she looked at me very seriously and said no honey we shouldn’t tell them that. What if they believe it? I giggled and she again looked at me and said very seriously “No… if they think I can do that they’ll put me away”. At that I stopped took her hand and agreed to not play our joke. I took note in my heart that last year was the last of an era of family April fool's fun. A bit sad that her mind was not as clear anymore and that she might be forgetting all the fun we'd had in the past; I just read to her for a while. As I was leaving she asked me to take her outside for a bit, it was such a beautiful day. As we rolled past the nurse’s station, someone asked her where she was headed. She promptly answered, "Out to meet up with my old friends in the RV, they’ve been writing to me for months now". I laughed so hard I am sure they all thought mom’s dementia was over the top as we went outside. On the patio area she looked at me, smiled slyly and said, “We sure played a joke on them didn’t we?” Yes mama, we did. Thank you for the April fool’s day smile. Micheline Edwards Copyright 2015 The photos are of my parents in Jan 2015 just before my mom fell and approx 51 years ago when they met and married. .